Teenage Writers

Hi all!

This week I'm going to talk about writing as a teenager. I've seen a lot of stuff online that says this is an 'issue' and I want to prove otherwise.

I finished the first draft of Blood and Water when I was seventeen. I was curious how to go about editing and preparing it for querying so I read a lot of blog posts from other authors. These were very helpful to read as they taught me how to self edit effectively. However, some I came across were very much against teenagers publishing, or even writing.

Some argued that they are too immature, that they will wreck their chances in the industry before they have even stepped out the door. I think this is really unfair as I've heard of more older authors who destroy their chances by bad mouthing agents or not following submission guidelines. Teenagers aren't the only ones who do it. A lot are more mature than others give them credit for, they may have been writing since they were young and want to try to write a novel. It's what I did.

I wrote a lot of stories about cats until I was about thirteen, then I started writing Fanfiction. Both of these styles of writing helped me grow my writing abilities, but some authors were saying that teenagers should stick to Fanfiction until they are 'old enough'. I think this is really unfair, there is no age where you can start writing novels. If teenagers want to do it, it doesn't harm anyone. There isn't a minimum age you need to be to get an agent.

I also think it's a bit demeaning towards their younger fans, age is just a number. If they have an idea they want to turn into a novel, encourage them. There's no point in putting people down, it doesn't make you a better writer.

Why do some people think that teenagers writing is a problem?

If they want to write, let them. It doesn't effect your writing at all, so these people should just concentrate on themselves rather than worrying about everyone else.

I loved writing when I was younger, and to see stuff like that really put me down as I thought I wouldn't be taken seriously.
When I was researching agents I came across one who had a sixteen year old as one of her clients, which taught me that agents don't care about your age. They just want a good book.

Although I ended up not querying Blood and Water until January 2018, I don't regret putting it off. It helped my writing to grow and become better.

Now that I'm self publishing, I really want to inspire young people to write, no matter their age. I've tried to search for some of the posts as examples but a lot have been taken down. I'm not sure whether it's because they received backlash or their perspective changed. Either way, I'm happy they're gone. As writers we need to encourage each other, not put other people down.

Young people can write just as well as someone who is older, and as someone who writes for teenagers, I want to encourage them.

Erin Hunter inspired me when I was young, and I want to inspire young adults as she inspired me. I want them to have an escape, an opportunity to forget about everything and get lost in a book. One day I hope that Elemental Dragons or one of my other series will inspire someone to chase their dreams of writing.

That's what I hate it when people bad mouth teenage authors, we're supposed to inspiring and encouraging them. Writing about how 'immature' and 'unprofessional' they are will just put them off.

I would have been heartbroken if my favourite author and mouthed part of their fan base just because of their age. That's why I'll try my hardest to encourage young people through my writing. I want to give them the same opportunity for escape that I had.

That's it for this week! Next week I'm going to write about Twitter Pitch Parties, and how they can help you get an agent.

See you next week!

Why Self Publishers Need a Professional Editor

Hi all!

This week I'm going to talk about editors for self publishers, and why they are vital to self publish your book. I got Blood and Water edited professionally, and I am so thankful I did. She was wonderful, and she helped me fix things that I didn't even notice when I was editing it myself. I am hoping to go back to her to edit the rest of the Elemental Dragons series.

First off, the big question: if I can edit myself, why do I need an editor?

There are several reasons you need an editor, and if you want your book to be the best it can be, you're going to need at least one person professionally looking over your work.

They will not hold back.

Your book is your baby, of course you're going to be soft on it. I know I was with Blood and Water, I was too nervous to cut things that, in hindsight, I didn't need. Editors will not think about your book in this way, and they will critique it fairly.

They can spot things you've missed.

After reading your book and editing it over and over there are things you will miss, but that's okay. An editor is more likely to pick up spelling and grammar mistakes because they have never read your book before. Their eyes are not used to the words like you are.

It's a fresh pair of eyes.

As above, they can spot mistakes and suggest corrections better than you can. They can look at your manuscript with a clean slate.

Family and friends aren't enough.

Their feedback will be biased, no matter how they try to convince you other wise. You need someone who will give you truly honest feedback.

It will make your book more professional.

When selling a book it needs to be the best it can be, no-one wants to read a book full of spelling and continuity errors when there are thousands out there that have been edited. Don't shoot yourself in the foot before you've even started.

They can sort plot holes.

I didn't realise that Blood and Water had any plot holes left until I got my editor. I had completely forgotten that a dragon was supposed to be patrolling hallways as stated in the first chapter! So I quickly fixed that.

They can make suggestions.

My editor didn't like the ending to Blood and Water, so I revamped it. It was a huge cliffhanger, but she suggested I change it to something a little more subtle, so I did.

They can point out character flaws.

One flaw that I had was the relationship between two siblings, Hazel and Rocky. She thought some parts were a bit out of character and suggested I remove chapters that are in his point of view. I did, and it made the story flow so much better!

They're not all bad, they'll tell you what they love about your work too.

It's not all criticism, they will let you know what parts they liked and how to improve the rest of the story to reflect the good parts.

Of course, editors are expensive. But, they are so worth it. To get feedback on how to improve your work is priceless. You do have to pick the right editor of course. I picked mine because I felt that she corrected my test pages the best and was also in my price range. I looked her up and saw that she had a lot of experience of editing in my genre, which was great. You don't really want a sci-fi editor for your historical mystery, do you?

That's it for this week! Next week I'm going to write about writing as a teenager. See you then!

How to Query Correctly

Hi all!

As promised, this week I will be writing about querying agents/publishers. I hope you enjoy!

Before I decided to self publish I queried both agents and publishers for nine months. It's a gruelling process, as each company has different guidelines and interests. Some will get back to you, and some won't. Some will like your work, some won't. You shouldn't take any of it personally, it's a subjective business. 

As you can guess, I didn't get represented.

But that doesn't mean it was a waste of time for me, querying made me realize that traditional publication wasn't really what I wanted. Although I got loads of rejections, they helped me grow as an author.

Always follow their guidelines.

Don't ignore guidelines, companies use them for a reason. It will not make you stand out if you just do whatever you want, it will make you come across as incompetent. If you don't follow the guidelines, your query will be rejected without a glance. If they want you to use a certain font size, use it. If they want your query double spaced, do it.

For agents, address them by name.

Many agents prefer you to use at least their first name when addressing them in your query. It clearly shows that you want them to read it and possibly represent you. Make sure you spell their name correctly, nothing will turn an agent off in the first sentence if you can't even spell their name right.

Don't spam them with emails.

Once you've sent the initial query, don't nudge them constantly. If on their website they have a time frame they will often state that you can ask them after that date. It's usually eight to twelve weeks. If you constantly spam them a few weeks after, you will be rejected.

Don't submit to multiple agents in the same agency unless specified.

Most agencies in the UK state that a rejection from one agent is a rejection from the whole agency. Don't submit to another agent if they say not to because the agency will find out.

Don't submit to agents who don't represent your genre.

It's simply a waste of their time and yours.

If you get rejected, don't berate them on social media.

This is the fastest way to get you blacklisted from many agencies and publishers.

If you get rejected, don't email them back with nasty comments.

It isn't necessary, just because one doesn't want to represent your work doesn't mean that someone else won't. Don't destroy your chances because you couldn't control your anger.

You will get rejected.

It's natural, but as I've said in my previous post about rejection, don't let it get you down. Keep going.

Research.

Make sure you research who you query. Some companies might look legit but are actually dodgy. At least give them a quick search before sending.

Keep track of who you have queried.

Keep a list of outstanding queries and rejections, this will help you keep track in the long run. I used links for each website and put them in different files based on the query status.

Keep writing!

Don't stop just because you're querying something! Writing something else on the side can keep you distracted while also making sure those creative juices are flowing.

That's it for this week, hope you enjoyed it!

My 2019 Writing Goals

Hi all!

Seeing as it's now a new year, I thought I would tell you all about my writing goals for 2019! 

Publishing Blood and Water.

Yes, I will be self publishing Blood and Water this year. I'm aiming for a Winter release so then I have time to do all the research I can. I don't want to mess this up at all, I want this to be as successful as possible. However, I've done a lot of work already! So far I have:

- Had it edited by a professional editor (who is amazing!).

- Created a website.

- Created a blog.

- Grown my Twitter page.

- Created my Facebook page.

- Created a Goodreads page.

- Started MailChimp (though I'm still struggling with getting a P.O. Box, which is the only thing holding me back from creating my mailing list. I'm hoping to sort that out in the next few weeks).

- Looked up copyright.

- Hired a cover designer (cover reveal in May I hope!).

- Bought loads of books about self publishing.

- Researched thoroughly.

Despite all of that though, I've still got a long way to go. I started 2018 hoping to go down the traditional publishing route, but now I'm doing the opposite. It's terrifying, my anxiety keeps trying to tell me to stop but I'm not going to. Although it's going to be stressful, I hope it will be worth it in the long run. Writing is one of the only things I'm good at and I don't want to fail.

Write two books.

I'm setting a goal this year to write two books. One will be Nirvana, my YA sci-fi about a virus that doesn't kill you, but gives you the opportunity to bite more people to reach the afterlife. The other will be the last installment in the Elemental Dragons series: Cinder and Fire. Although I'm sad to have reached the end of this series, I'm so glad that I wrote it. Who knows, this might not even be the last book set in that universe!

Get Venom and Earth professionally edited.

The second book in my Elemental Dragons series need a to be looked over by an editor, so once I've done a bit more polishing I'll send it off.

Self edit Glass and Ice.

I haven't touched this book since NaNoWriMo, so it really needs some editing. I'm sure it's a terrible first draft but I'm hoping I can turn it into something great.

Decide which WIP to start next.

I have a bunch of ideas, and I'm hoping to decide which one to start once Cinder and Fire is done. Nirvana is the first in a trilogy so I'm going to continue that, but I also want another WIP to write on the side. So far my ideas are:

- YA Historical Fantasy trilogy.

- YA dystopian standalone.

- YA dystopian/sci-fi standalone.

- NA sci-fi standalone.

- NA paranormal mystery standalone.

As you can see I have a lot of ideas so you can expect loads of books from me! I have three series planned: Elemental Dragons (YA fantasy - four books), Damaged Goods (YA Historical Fantasy - three books) and Bitten (YA sci-fi - three books). So I'll be writing a mix of series and standalone, but I just need to decide which one to start next!

Take part in NaNoWriMo again.

I loved doing it last year, and I want to take part again this year! I'll probably be writing Cinder and Fire but it depends on whether I start it earlier in the year or not.

That's it for this week, I hope you all have a successful year with your writing! Stick around next week for when I talk about how not to query an agent/publisher. Just because I'm going down the self publishing route doesn't mean that I won't help those that want to be traditionally published as well.

Twitter for Writers

Hi all!

This week I'm going to talk about Twitter. It's a popular social media platform which makes it easy to interact with your fans and follow other authors. It's also great for marketing your book or author platform. However, the way you act can either make you or break you on Twitter.

Don't spam.

This is true for any social media. No one wants their feed filled with the same post by the same person over and over. Not only is it boring, but it will make followers more likely to unfollow you to clear their feed.

Don't ignore your followers.

Interact! Like, retweet and comment on posts. Not only will you make some friends, but your followers will be happy to talk to you.

Don't constantly post about your books.

Mix it up. Pin your latest book at the top of your profile so it's the first tweet people see when they click on your name. Only post about your book for announcements, promotions and launch dates. There's no need to post about your book several times a day, the thousandth tweet won't make people more likely to buy your book.

Be courteous.

The writing community is amazing on Twitter, I've met so many lovely people on there. Don't be horrible, it will get you blocked and turn people away from your books.

Don't pretend to be better than everyone else.

We're all in the same boat as writers, you don't need to put people down in order to elevate yourself. You'll lose followers.

Don't blast people on Twitter.

Get rejected by an agent? That's a shame, but you don't need to expose them on social media. Agents talk, they will not want to take on someone like that. Someone left you a negative review? Again, take it as a learning curve. Don't moan about them for everyone to see.

Don't follow people, wait for them to follow back, then unfollow.

It's rude, some will remember you if you follow them again. If you don't want to interact with them, don't follow.

Don't brag.

Please don't brag about how well your book is doing constantly and how much money you're raking in. It's not attractive. Writers who struggle don't want that thrust in their face every time they go on your profile. To be proud of your achievement is fine, but if every tweet is you talking about how great your book is people will unfollow.

Don't use it as a platform to hate others.

Once a tweet is out there, you can't take it back. Be careful what you post. 

Don't blindly follow everyone who follows you back.

I know it can be hard to check everyone when several people follow you at one time but it is worth it. If you follow blindly you don't know who you're following and what they promote. Always check to make sure you're comfortable following them.

Don't ignore people because they write in a different genre.

No genre is better than the other. I've seen a lot of romance and erotica authors feel down because some people don't interact with them for writing in those genres. We're all writers, we shouldn't exclude anyone.

Don't bash publication routes.

Traditional Publishing? Great! Just don't bash indie authors for their choice or claiming that your book is better. This is the same for indie authors, don't bash the traditional ones. Just because they got a contract doesn't mean that you are superior to them. Whatever route you go down is your choice so you shouldn't harass others for theirs.

Don't compare yourself to others.

People will have more followers than you. They will have more book sales, better reviews. Don't put yourself down because of it. If people like your work, they will follow you.

Don't instantly message people book links as soon as they follow you.

More likely than not, this will result in an unfollow. It's annoying and it doesn't work. You need to build up a fan base, not thrust your book into everyone's face.

Be kind.

There are so many people on Twitter and you don't know all their struggles. Be kind, always. You never know what friends you will make.

That's it for this week! The next post will be my goals for 2019, which includes news about the Elemental Dragons series. See you next week!

Don't be Ashamed to Write Fanfiction

Hi all,

This week I'm going to talk about Fanfiction, and why you shouldn't be ashamed to write it.

Firstly, Fanfiction is when someone writes a story using a book's setting, plot or characters. Most people write about their own original characters, or 'OCs' and how they would fit into this world.

I've seen a lot of authors being shamed online for writing Fanfiction, as they are using someone else's ideas and changing the plot.

There's nothing wrong with that.

As long as they source the original work and express that it is fan made, there is no harm done. They also don't try to sell these works because that would breach copyright. 

Fanfiction is a fun way to write without having to worry about doing all the world building yourself, it's already been done for you. It's a great way to improve your writing skills and also inspire you to come up with your own original work. I started off writing Fanfiction for my favourite book series, Warriors by Erin Hunter. I still love those books to this day (though I really need to catch up with some of the newer books).

Were they badly written?

Yes, but seeing as I wrote Fanfiction from thirteen to eighteen I could see the improvement.

Were there spelling errors?

You bet.

Did you use OCs?

Yep, creating OCs in the Warriors universe helped me greatly with personality and character flaws.

Did readers like the characters?

Yes, people loved my characters. When I left the site because of my schoolwork I passed one of my characters, Bouncepelt, to one of my most loyal readers.

Was the story good?

Kinda.

Do you regret writing it?

Not at all.

I wrote four Fanfiction novellas because of those books, I think I only managed to finish three before I had to stop to concentrate on my studies. It was a great creative outlet and I met so many lovely people from writing Fanfiction. It really improved my writing, as I just had to focus on nailing my characters because the background and rules had already been written. Although I look back on it now and cringe at how bad it is, I'm still glad that I loved a book series so much that I wanted to write about it and share it with the world.

Do not be ashamed to write Fanfiction.

It's not a bad thing at all, it's lovely to see authors expanding on someone else's work. I love reading Fanfiction, I think I've read more Fanfiction this month than books!

Of course, not all Fanfiction is good.

But, I'm the other hand you can go into any book store and pick up an awful traditionally published book or scroll through Amazon and find an unedited mess of an ebook. Shaming someone for reading Fanfiction does not make you look good. Plus, coming up with original ideas all the time can be exhausting. Why not take a break but also fulfill your writing needs at the same time?

I've also seen some of the following as to why people don't regard Fanfiction as 'proper' writing:

- It's copyright.

- Authors don't like it.

- You're stealing someone's work.

- You're not coming up with any ideas yourself.

- It's lazy.

- All Fanfiction is poorly written.

None of the above are true. Fanfiction is an important creative outlet, and I'd encourage people to write Fanfiction about my work if they were that inspired by it. Most authors are flattered that people love their work so much, so don't be afraid of backlash.

In conclusion, if you want to write Fanfiction, do it. If you don't want to, don't. But neither side should be shaming the other for their choice. We need to support each other no matter the writing route we take.

Thank you for reading this week's post! Did you ever write Fanfiction? Share in the comments!

Ways to Spot a Vanity Publisher

Hi all!

As promised, this week's blog post is about vanity publishers.

First off, what is a vanity publisher?

A vanity publisher is a publishing house where authors pay a high fee to get their book published. Unlike hybrid publishers, they do not give you a high quality product in return or help with marketing. Many vanity publishers attempt to disguise themselves as hybrid publishers, but don't do a good job of doing so.

Here are a few ways you can spot a vanity publisher:

They charge extremely high fees.

Most will charge in the thousands to produce your book. This is supposed to cover the costs of editing, marketing, printing and distribution. However, most of the books come out as low quality and difficult to read.

When you Google their names, hundreds of bad reviews come up.

Look at what other authors have to say. Have they received a horrible book in return for a £4000 fee? Run. These people are not trying to destroy a legitimate business, they are warning others against making the same mistakes.

You pay thousands for their logo to be slapped on your book.

That's it. They don't pay for anything. You simply give them money to have their logo on your book for 'exposure' to their fan base. This is a scam, you will pay for everything else as well. You're basically a self publisher who sunk thousands into a company who let you slap their image on your cover. Not worth it.

Their other books are poor quality.

If other authors are left with a shoddy book, so will you. They will pay as little as possible to editors and cover designers, so don't expect your book to look professional.

They follow a lot of people on social media but very few follow back.

You can tell when a vanity publisher is looking for new authors as they might go on a following spree to make more people notice their business.

They approach you directly to submit.

You might get a message from them telling you that they're interested in your project and would like you to submit. But how do they know your project is right for them? They don't! They're just preying on authors who want to achieve their dream of publishing.

There's little, or no, criteria for submitting.

Anything goes, from picture books to erotica. Many publishing houses focus on a few genres and try not to mix the age ranges inappropriately. If they accept anything and everything in one department, there's a high chance they'll take anything they can get for money.

No one seems to get rejected by them.

Everyone who submits gets accepted. Strange, huh? The more clients they accept, the more money they make. They're highly unlikely to turn potential clients away.

They accept you, then send a contract asking for money.

Publishers do not accept money from authors to publish books. The author only pays for their own marketing, unless they're going down the hybrid route.

They publish a lot of books, but don't sell many.

Why would they need to? They've taken your money, they don't need to actually well books to make a profit, they just charge their clients.

Their books aren't in book shops.

If you can't find any of their titles in book shops despite the claims that they distribute to them, they don't distribute. Ask the shop owner. Have they heard of the publishing house? Have they ever stocked any of their books?

When pressed for more information, they get defensive.

If you ask a few questions about any queries you have that might shine them in a bad light, they'll get defensive or stop talking to you completely.

Their website is under another business name.

This means that they have changed the name of their business. It's usually a way of them hiding the fact that their previous name was a vanity, so they think that a change of them might trick new clients. Make sure to check online if they've changed their name for a legitimate reason.

That's it for this week! Feel free to share any stories you have about vanity publishers in the comments!

The Truth Behind Writing 'Myths/Rules'

Hi all!

This week I'm going to be talking about writing myths, hope you enjoy!

Writing is a solitary experience.

No, it's not. Social media is a brilliant way for authors to contact each other, not to mention there are write-ins and events for authors to go to.

It's an easy way to make money.

If you're in it to make easy money, you're in the wrong industry. It's tough to write books and it's even tougher to sell them.

You're either born a writer or aren't.

I hate hearing this one. Practice makes perfect, if you want to master something you have to keep doing it. Trying to put people off by saying they can't be a writer because they aren't 'born' with it is stupid.

You need connections in the industry to get anywhere.

Not true, most authors have no connections in the industry before they publish a book. The ones that do are the lucky ones, but even that doesn't guarantee success.

Authors need to compete with each other.

No, we don't. Support writers, don't compete with them. Someone has not stolen 'your chance' because they got an agent or published a book. There is always room for more authors.

All writers are introverts.

Nope, this is a big misconception. Although I'm an introvert myself, I know a lot of extroverted writers. Personality does not dictate whether you can write or not.

Writers need to write every single day.

If you do this, you'll burn out quite quickly. Setting a writing goal is important as it can keep you on track, but it doesn't need to be an every day thing. Some people blow this way out of proportion by not feeling like a writer if they take a day off. Don't worry, your story isn't going anywhere. You can and must take a break every once in a while.

The first book an author writes gets published.

I've heard this a lot too, and it's quite often not the case. Some authors shelve multiple projects before getting published.

Agents are unnecessary in traditional publishing.

In traditional publishing you will more likely than not need an agent. Although there are publishers who accept unsolicited manuscripts, you need to keep your options as open as possible. Agents can negotiate contracts and support you during the publication process, they are there to help, not hinder you.

You need to pay your publisher to get traditionally published.

This is called a vanity publisher. Do not give them money. More often than not you will get a poorly designed and edited book in return. They will not support you at all, they just see you as a money machine. Many will ask that you pay thousands up front to publish your book. If you are contacted by one or accidentally submit, do not sign a contract with them.

You don't need an editor.

Unless you are 100% accurate at spotting all spelling errors, grammar mistakes, plot holes and cliches I highly recommend getting an editor. Mine was absolutely brilliant, although it can be hard to see your work get torn apart it is so worth it to see the final product. Readers will be able to spot a professionally edited book from a mile off. Don't put people off your future book because you didn't want an editor.

Book covers don't matter.

Book covers are the first thing a reader sees. You need to make sure it's professional and appropriate for your genre. If you're writing crime, then putting a glowing wolf on the cover wouldn't make much sense, would it?

You can only write one genre.

You are not a one trick pony. If you want to write in another genre, do it. There's nothing holding you back, it will bring you new readers and also give you opportunities to have a change of scenery every once in a while.

Characters cannot ___.

I've seen a lot of variants of this. Whether it be sighing, shrugging or rolling their eyes. Ignore these, you write your characters however you want. Just make sure you have a variety.

That's it for this week! Next Sunday I'm going to delve into vanity publishers a bit, seeing as there have been a few pitch parties on Twitter. I've been 'liked' twice by vanity publishers in a pitch party, so I just want to share with you how to spot them before you submit.

See you next week!

Write What You Want to Write

Hi all!

This week I'm going to talk about, in my opinion, the best writing advice out there.

Write what you want to write.

When I was a teenager and looking into publishing I came across so much bogus advice from authors and publishers alike. Most said that you need to write to market, rather than whatever you feel like writing.

This is 100% not true.

The market changes so quickly that there's no point in writing to trends. Unless you're able to pump out a publishable book in under six months and get it out there the market will move on.

Yes, publishers and agents do keep an eye on what sells well and they will try to get similar books, but don't write something that will become insignificant in a year's time just for the sake of it. Writing what everyone else is writing doesn't make you stand out whatsoever.

So that's why I write what I want to write. If I enjoy it, I'm sure someone else will too. Writing what you want to write has so many benefits, such as:

- Enjoying the writing aspect of your work, not just reading it.

- Finding an audience that enjoys the subjects you write about for years to come.

- Less time stressing about how quickly you write, edit and publish a book.

- Not having to worry about passing trends.

Agents and publishers do keep an eye on the market to stay fresh, but that doesn't mean they want hundreds of the same story being thrust at them. They want originality and variety as well. They also know that to keep up with the trends you have to publish quickly, while many like to take their time with editing and author marketing.

Plus, what's the point in writing something that you don't enjoy?

If you don't enjoy what you're writing, it will reflect in your work. When you love something it adds a passion to your work that you struggle to recreate if you're bored.

If I had listened to this advice, then I would have scrapped Blood and Water to write something I'm really not interested in. I may not be still writing today if I hadn't continued doing what I wanted to do.

Don't get sucked into trends, concentrate on what you love. If you love it, others will love it too. It doesn't matter if a book about vampires is big at the moment, if your romance story is the complete opposite keep at it. 

After all, it just takes one book to change the market.

How do you know that your book won't be the one to start a trend? Your book could be the one that everyone wishes they had written first. You never know unless you finish writing it.

Thank you for reading! I just want to say a big thank you to everyone who cheered me on during NaNoWriMo as I managed to hit 83,156 words! Congratulations to everyone else who participated too, it doesn't matter if you hit 50K or not, we've all got something to work with!

Next week I'm going to debunk writing myths, so if you've got any that you want me to research then please leave them in the comments.

See you next week!

Why I Hated GCSE English at School

Hi all!

This is a sort of part two to last week's post about why I didn't do a creative writing degree. Before I start I just want to say good luck to everyone on the last push for NaNoWriMo!

Anyway, on with the story.

I didn't always hate English, it was only when I got to secondary school in the middle of year ten (that's fifteen years old for anyone confused). I had a lovely teacher who was funny and tried to make the classes interesting for us.

Then she left.

Her replacement did not like me. As a quiet kid, I used to just keep my head down and get on with the work, but that was terrible according to her. She loved the loud kids who always disrupted the class but absolutely despised anyone who never spoke.

Because of my anxiety, I was the biggest target in the class.

It started off small, with her giving me the occasional glare as I sat in the front row (because she wanted to keep an eye on me). Eventually she moved me further back because she found me 'too self centered' to put my hand up.

Pretty soon it evolved to her picking on me in class and picking apart any answer I gave, which did absolutely nothing for my anxiety and only heightened my depression because I thought I was stupid.

At some point though, she decided to step it up a notch. She thought none of us could spell so she started setting spelling tests in class. I knew how to spell pretty well, so it didn't worry me too much. 

Then she marked it.

She would deliberately mark my correct spellings as incorrect and write the same word next to my correctly spelt one. I thought it was my handwriting, so I wrote them in capital letters so she could read them properly.

Nope.

She marked my correctly spelled word as wrong, and wrote the incorrect spelling next to it. It really irked me to see that I was getting dragged down because of it. I checked my friend's spellings, and she spelled it the same as me and got marked right. So the teacher knew the correct spelling, knew I had done it correctly, but penalised me anyway.

I wasn't happy, but my mum refused to complain and told me to suck it up.

So, I did.

The next big thing was when we had to create a PowerPoint and present it in front of the class. I was terrified.

We had to talk about one of our hobbies, and I chose writing. Throughout my entire presentation she ignored the people talking over me and kept snapping at me to get in view of he camera (they had to be recorded for some reason). Once I was finished she tapped the table impatiently as she waited for the other teacher to give me a score. I got a B which I thought was great, until they mentioned that the teacher decided to mark me down because of my nervous mannerisms. I usually touch my hair a lot and stutter when I present in front of people, and she decided that was bad enough to mark me down. No one else got marked down for being nervous.

Another incident happened when we had to do a group project, which would be part of our overall grade as well. Like I said in the last post, no one really liked having me in their group so I just got stuck with whoever. To get the grade we had to discuss a topic and write notes on it, it was to test our speaking and listening skills.

So, as soon as I joined the group, the other members kicked off when they found out we would all get graded the same, no matter who displayed more skills. I really, really tried to speak as much as I could but I was just so nervous and everyone else kept ignoring me or speaking over me. We all got Cs, which I was pretty happy with because I passed. The others in my group were the A and A* lot, so they were not happy to get a C.

I could see from the absolute look of disgust on their faces that they weren't happy. When the grades were announced the teacher let us chat for a bit, which meant that my group were just talking smack about how useless I was and I was ruining their future. 

I wanted to cry.

The teacher saw this going on, and encouraged them. She went over and apologised that I had dragged them down and she would be having words with me. She told them not worry however, because people like me always end up working for people like them so they'd get the last laugh.

Somehow I managed to last another year in that class before a light appeared at the end of the tunnel: the creative writing exam. 

I was ecstatic.

I couldn't wait to actually enjoy an exam for once, and practice my writing while I was at it.

Of course, she had to ruin it somehow. First she told me that you should never, ever describe a character. Apparently the reader doesn't care. I knew that was a load of crap and described them anyway. She tore me apart in front of the whole class for daring to describe one of my characters as having dark skin. Some people called me racist for including that character as the teacher told them that you can only write characters the same skin colour as you or you're racist.

Second, I didn't know what a semicolon was. She jumped on that in no time, she convinced me that semicolons are to be used in every sentence instead of commas. This confused the hell out of me and I replaced all commas with semicolons. Looking back I think I'm so stupid for listening, because it cost me a few extra marks.

Anyway, once my GCSEs were done I decided that I was not going to allow myself to be treated like that in such a hostile environment. She ruined my favourite subject for me, I just couldn't do it any further. I did not want to get ridiculed by someone like her again.

So I didn't do it at A Level, instead I chose subjects that made me happy.

I don't regret it, because I was a little bit more relaxed in these subjects and I was treated better.

Anyway, sorry for another depressing story but I think it's important that people realise that the tiniest actions can have huge consequences. Especially on teenagers. Be kind and encourage them, don't bring them down.

I haven't decided on a subject for next week so keep your eyes peeled!