Hi all,
As it's Pride Month, I thought I'd share the story of how I realised I was bisexual. I came out a few years ago but I never shared the story of how I realised I wasn't straight.
During secondary school, I did have a crush on a girl in one of my classes. I think I was in year nine or ten, which would have made me about fifteen or sixteen. At the time, I thought it was normal. The other girls would go on about their 'girl crushes' so I assumed that it was normal to like girls in that way. Before that I thought that girls were really pretty but again, thought that was normal too.
As I got older I found more women attractive but didn't really see a correlation with it until I was eighteen. I discovered the word bisexuality during Pride Month and figured that the label would fit me, but I wasn't sure. I still didn't know if I was experiencing what everyone else experienced or if it was something else.
When I was nineteen I broached the subject with one of my friends at the time. She laughed me off and claimed that I couldn't be bisexual as I hadn't dated a woman. She told me that I was seeking attention and looking for something that would make me stand out from other people. That annoyed me at the time, but I couldn't fully articulate why so she just made fun of me further. She also liked to make fun of my body, anxiety, depression and boyfriend at the time.
A few weeks later she messaged me that she had a dream about having sex with a woman, so she must be bisexual. At that point I lost it and cut her off, as I knew deep down that she was just trying to agitate me. Well, it worked but I'd had enough of her antics at that point. I haven't spoken to her since. I didn't want to hear her constant put downs, especially about my sexuality, which I still wasn't sure about.
Since then, I've come to terms with my sexuality and came out. I still find it to be so empowering when I write my sexuality on forms, it makes me feel like my feelings have been validated.
If you are questioning your identity, don't listen to those who put you down. Give yourself time to figure things out and don't feel pressured to come out. You do what you want on your own time. It took me a few years, but I'm now comfortable with who I am and who I'm attracted to. I'm still me, no matter what.
If you are wondering if you’re bisexual or you’re not entirely sure what it is, do some research and see what it means to you. I’ve had a look at this website which specificlly focuses on bisexuality for those who want to learn more.
That's it for this week! I've got another blog post planned for Pride Month, about things I've heard as a bisexual woman. See you next Sunday.
